Sporting my spiffy new contacts that enhanced my vision of every tree leaf and spectacular flower in sight in the lovely city of Los Angeles, I glanced into the mirror in my bathroom and wilted like an unattended high-maintenance orchid at the sight of puffy bags under my eyes and the ever-so-resilient silver roots that thrive like bastard dandelions in the front lawn that is my (and Miss Clairol’s boxed #110 “Light Auburn”) hair.
I could already see the cover of People magazine …
“Prolific Hollywood “Stand-In to the Stars” Rushed to Emergency Room Due to Exhaustion and Dehydration!”
(OK, so maybe I wouldn’t actually make the cover, but if you haven’t noticed my blogs subtitle, I dream HUGE!)
Suffice it say, I was TIRED…
Dear GOD, eight weeks in a row without a break! What a blessing and a curse!
Now, I know full-well that people who work outside of my bizarre chosen path in the Hollywood Industry are consistently baffled that we, (in the effed-up world of entertainment, and in my case, multi-camera sit-coms) need hiatuses to recuperate after what appears to be nothing more than going to a job and laughing and having fun.
And there IS a hearty truth to that!
But just ask any Script Supervisor, Electrician, Grip, Painter, Set Dresser, Props, Construction, Hair, Make-Up, Cameras, Audio, ADs, P.A’s., Interns, or humble Stand–In (please forgive me if I left anyone out, but I’m on a typing tirade here!) how unbelievably mentally draining the creative process can be.
Rome wasn’t built in a day – and for whatever multiple reasons, neither is a 19:37 minute sitcom!
But tired or not, Miss Clairol and I were going to have to tend to the problem, even if only for a couple of days on the DP’s $37,000 High Def monitor, darn it! And then finally, HIATUS!!!
>>><<<
With Pilot Season in full bloom like the White House Garden of Roses and a gazillion smiling faces adorning the Studio Lot like buds in blossom all reaching toward the sun hoping for a full season of shows, three people threw their arms around me and congratulated me on an upcoming pilot.
“I’m SO GLAD you get to be HER!” one extremely competitive (also red-headed) fellow Stand-In offered cheerily, clasping me in a superficial Hollywood hug as I stared at her blankly.
“I’m not following you…” I replied honestly.
“Well, naturally I thought I was going to be HER, but I guess SHE told them that she has her own Stand-In.”
“I’m still not getting what you’re saying…” I continued, utterly baffled. “I’m on my first hiatus in a long time next week, then wrapping out our last three episodes of Season Two on this show” I told her, pointing at the massive elephant doors painted with our title.
“Hunh… Well, I guess I was wrong then!” my competition beamed, cocking her head and patting me ‘supportively’ on the arm. “Have a super-duper GREAT hiatus!” she added with both shoulders up and an eerie twinkle glowing in her eyes.
>>><<<
Walking back onstage, I couldn’t help but shake my head in confusion.
“What’s up, Pen?” a co-worker wondered as I relayed the previous events of lunchtime. “Oh, you mean the pilot for ABC?” he laughed. “Yeah, you’re already on board! Let me email you the crew list” he added helpfully, naturally assuming that I had some sort of magical technical device with which to open and view said email on my person.
“Thanks!” I smiled, my ancient flip-phone blinking an apologetic green light at its helpless inability to access the World Wide Web. “Do you happen to know who the ADs are?” I mused ever-so-casually.
“Oh sure. Let me write down their numbers for you” he added, scrolling through his techno gizmo.
>>><<<
After a couple of dropped calls to the first AD on the pilot (and a few more hours of camera blocking on my regular show), I eventually found a place of solitude and quiet to speak to whomever it might have been that had potentially hired me without my knowledge.
“I’m hoping to bring in all the Stand-Ins sooner” the lady informed me. “But for now, it’s budgeted at just Friday, Monday and Tuesday; but lots of them – not YOU of course – need to cover multiple characters.”
“Okay…” I added still ever-so-confused in the moment, as she continued to provide me with further information; one particular nugget of which sent me positively over the moon with joy!
>>><<<
“Um, I seem to have booked a pilot during our hiatus” I explained with all due humility to my first AD.
“How are you doing a pilot if I’m not doing the pilot?” he retorted sarcastically.
“Uh… apparently I was kinda requested…” I squirmed uncomfortably. “And I’d have to miss ONE day here, a MONDAY, but then I’d be back on WEDNESDAY for SURE, and we always have re-writes any way, PLUS the office emails us all the scripts and I already have someone to cover me!” I cowered properly submissively.
“Let me think about that…” my AD wandered off.
“Yes sir” I replied complacently.
>>><<<
Truth be told, as servile as I may have appeared in the moment, (I’ve been told that I’m a relatively decent Actress), come hell or high water and exhaustion be damned, I was destined to work on this pilot!
Yes dear friends, I have been invited to be reunited with a very special lady indeed! (Not to mention a HOST of people that I spent six and a half years of my life with as “family”!)
Hmmm…
Now if I can only retrain my current pea-brain and vocal chords to go from New York Yiddish to an acceptable blend of Oklahoma/Texas/Tennessee accents without any transitional meshegas, I think I just might pull this off!
Looking forward to my very first visit to the Walt Disney Studios (the last on my Bucket List of locations) and pleased to be under a Network contract if only for a few days,
~One (Adaptable!) Red Cent
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