Sunday, May 29, 2011

Throwing Our Weight Around


“I don’t like the necklace” the adolescent boy stomped onto the set to confront my gorgeous actress already clad in full hair, make-up and wardrobe.  “That, that, that, that THING looks likes it’s made of pearls!” he threw his hands in the air exec-utorially, “and you’re supposed to be just starting out with your business!” he buttoned his brat-like tantrum with a heavy sigh of disapproval.
Frankly, had this been a rumble on the street, I do believe that in its entirety our loyal crew would have come slam-smashing to our actress’ defense and pummeled the crap out of the scrawny bastard for daring to speak so unjustly to our beautiful beloved heroine!  But since none of us knew just exactly who the Justin Bieber-wannabe was, we hung back silently as a Very Important Producer Conglomeration took formation; and fifteen minutes later resuming pre-shooting of the scene, the lovely beaded choker that had graced the neck of our lead actress had mysteriously vanished.
Slinking into the darkness (as I’m wont to do) I ponied up to our stage PA and probed for some insider info.  “Who’s the snot-nosed toddler, who let him out of pre-school this early and did he ride his nifty skateboard onto the lot?” I whisper-asked my friend skeptically.
“Don’t know his name” our PA (who knows EVERYONE), whisper-replied back.  “All I know…” she added conspiratorially, “is that he’s Network.
“Ohh…” I nodded in accordance, scampering away appropriately out of sight.
There exists an unspoken yet well-understood echelon in show business.  
And weakling tweenager as he may have appeared to be, the emaciated young one carried some seriously heavy clout - significantly weightier than his well-gelled bangs.
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Having successfully camera-blocked the entire show in a ten hour day, I returned a late phone call Thursday night to my friend RJ in New York for a catch-up chat and a couple of cocktails.  My Friday would be easy-peasy!  My cast would simply camera-refresh and then head off to hair and make-up at 3pm!  And I would be home for a glorious Memorial Day Weekend by four o’clock to lounge blissfully in my jammies!!!
Oh, when will I learn…?
“PENNY!” my AD shouted as I reached for a miniature frosted brownie at Craft Services.  (Curses!)
“You are HER for the rest of the afternoon!” he informed me with a hearty pat on the back and a gentle hug.  And shuffling through the pages of my script I found myself once again presenting scenes with the actual cast in front of cameras and booms.
The weight on my shoulders to perform well with the actors for our Director and crew was profound; the perfectionism that I demand from myself whilst performing was significantly heavier…  But the miniscule weight that I bore personally was ridiculously insignificant in proportion to the entire process:
Please do enjoy the time-lapse video of my previous pilot.  (I’m one of the blurs on the left!)

Understanding why I sleep so effortlessly ‘til 4pm on my days off,
~P

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